I've been without internet for a few days because I reached the limit on my dongle. That's reset itself now, and my Virgin landline is active so I should be getting broadband soon. With any luck all my internet woes will be over. My other woes, however... well they're still in effect.
It's been a very weird few weeks. Being off my meds is never fun; having an episode is never fun; Neil having an episode is never fun; having severe ankle pain is never fun. All kinds of things are not fun. And when they all happen at the same time it's horrible. The fact that I haven't been able to see Neil in a while, and being off my meds, has dragged what is usually a two day episode in a several week one. I'm not used to drawn out episodes. I really don't like them. But I've been back on my meds for a week now, so they should kick in any time soon. And to be honest, now that this weekend is over with, I'll be able to deal with the whole Neil thing better. Though not as well as I will once I see him again.
This weekend was my first anniversary with Neil. We've been dating for two years, two months and three weeks. But it was off and on. We've been dating without a break for a year, now. And it was a big deal for me because I've never actually had a first year anniversary with anyone, which is pretty pathetic, but true. And I promised Neil that he never had to even acknowledge another anniversary, as long as we recognised this one. And then along came his episode. He's been saying for weeks now that he'd be down soon, and then giving dates, and then not showing. Was he here this weekend? No he was sodding not.
I'm not angry at him. I know it isn't his fault that his episodes manifest like this. I'm angry at the situation. I miss him like crazy. I haven't seen him since my episode started, and that just makes me feel ten times worse. When I episode I get paranoid and insecure and I'm terrified that I'm never going to see him again. It's a completely irrational fear, but it's there nonetheless. I can sort it by the end of the month. Next weekend I'm in Basingstoke, but after that, if he doesn't come here I'm going there, and there's nothing he can do to stop me. He can't get away from me that easily. *Insert crazy evil laugh here*
Aside from the combined episode, and missing Neil, things haven't been too bad. Last week at Slimming World I lost three lbs, although I have no idea how. Not sure I'm going to repeat it this week. I'm not eating properly, or healthily. It's kinda hard to do when you're in the midst of a depressive episode, and it's even harder to do when you have no fridge or freezer in which to store fresh or frozen food. And it's hard to exercise when your ankle is playing up.
Which is the other big issue in my life at the moment. My sodding ankle. It's been aching a LOT more than normal. I don't think it's stopped since before I went to America to be honest. And the other day I stepped too heavily on the stairs and had excruciating pain for a day or two. Last night I woke up crying because it hurt so much. I need to see a doctor about it really. I've spoken to GPs about it before, but they all tell me I need to lose weight. I'm working on it. See paragraph above. I was tempted to go to A&E today, see if they'd do anything, but I chickened out in the end. I feel silly for going when it's not an emergency. Stupid sodding foot. I want to chop the damn thing off, but Neil and Cayden quite rightly point out that I'd probably get phantom limb pain.
I don't really have much more to write about, although I think I could randomly ramble on for ages. I just wanted to let all my millions of loyal readers know that I'm still alive and although I've had a rough month, I'm getting better.
Showing posts with label Year of the Circuses. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Year of the Circuses. Show all posts
Circus # 5
Posted by
Cel'eena Cree
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Back in April, after attending my fourth circus of the year I decided to proclaim 2009 the Year of the Circuses. This evening, GKL and I attended my fifth circus of the year.
A few days ago in Abakhan I picked up this little leaflet...
Which lead me to this website, which ended with me purchasing two cheap opening night tickets. Tonight was opening night.
I was a little wary, but excited. I've seen a lot of circus acts recently, at the circuses I've been to and on tv and things. Circuses are in at the moment apparently. I'm also quite a cynical person by nature, so I'm wary. As we pulled into Trentham Gardens I got disappointed that there was no big top. A circus is not a proper circus without a big top. Then GKL took a left and said, "what? Like that one?"
(note: picture taken on the way out, it was not that dark when we got there)
At first all I could do was complain. The seats were built up so that none of the numbers were in any kind of order, they had the apostrophe missing from the big sign over the curtains the entertainers came from, the seats were bloody uncomfortable. And when the show started I wasn't overly impressed either. That starter bit where they get everyone in the ring was too cluttered and too hectic and badly organised. And the trapeze artist they started off with was kinda mediocre. I've seen better.
Then they had a little girl 8th generation horse trainer, who did some choreography with a beautiful palomino and a little shetland. GKL quite rightly pointed out that if it hadn't been the little girl controlling them, it would have been lame, but I was kinda focused on the beautiful horses. More about them later.
The in-between clowns weren't all that great either. They were ok for a minute or two, but dragged on far too long.
However, the show wasn't a complete bust. I saw my first ever highwire artists. These two brothers. The Marinhos. They ruled. No harnesses or anything. One of them did a little jig along the wire, the other rode a bike. One somersaulted over his brother's head, on a hire wire, with no harness, in mid air. It was great! They did a balancing on shoulders act which they preceeded with a "fall". If they hadn't been playing "The Show Must Go On" I might have believed it. It was very well acted. Talk about wedgie though. Ouch.
Anyway, they impressed me. A lot. I was also incredibly impressed by the horses. 8th generation trainer's dad came on in the second half with 4 palomino horses. Beautiful horses. Here's some pictures from the website...
These horses were magnificent. Four of them, with stupid names - Omega, Cartier, Rolex and Bronze - but absolutely beautiful. They reignited a passion in me, which I'll mention in my next post. They were gorgeous. I don't think I'm quite getting across how wonderful these horses were, lol.
On the way to the circus I'd mentioned to GKL that I'd always wanted to go to one of those old-fashioned circus that used animals. And that maybe I'd have to go to somewhere in Eastern Europe to see lions and tigers and elephants and stuff being mistreated. This circus had animals. Not just the horses, but the ringmaster did an act with budgies. Much funnier than it sounds. He had them going up little slides and jumping onto display cases and things. I was impressed at how well trained they were, but when they "misbehaved" it got even funnier. He got all of the little birdies to slide down this mini slide one by one, and the last one didn't want to get back on his perch afterwards, he kept running back around and doing it again. I thought it was quite funny. GKL was more enamoured with the teeny little boy standing on a ringside seat who was applauding ecstatically every time the little bird ran away. It was very cute.
Overall, despite some boring parts with the well-meaning clowns, I was quite impressed with Zippo's Circus. For 6 quid it was definitely worth the money, and lots more. Even the £2 candyfloss was worth it... scrummy.
It was a good night out, and I enjoyed it. I think GKL did too.
I may go again next time they're back. Those horses can't be guarded 24/7.
PS> For any animal rights activists out there, the horses are treated superbly. There is a page about it on their website. Apparently they've won awards.
A few days ago in Abakhan I picked up this little leaflet...
Which lead me to this website, which ended with me purchasing two cheap opening night tickets. Tonight was opening night.
I was a little wary, but excited. I've seen a lot of circus acts recently, at the circuses I've been to and on tv and things. Circuses are in at the moment apparently. I'm also quite a cynical person by nature, so I'm wary. As we pulled into Trentham Gardens I got disappointed that there was no big top. A circus is not a proper circus without a big top. Then GKL took a left and said, "what? Like that one?"
(note: picture taken on the way out, it was not that dark when we got there)
At first all I could do was complain. The seats were built up so that none of the numbers were in any kind of order, they had the apostrophe missing from the big sign over the curtains the entertainers came from, the seats were bloody uncomfortable. And when the show started I wasn't overly impressed either. That starter bit where they get everyone in the ring was too cluttered and too hectic and badly organised. And the trapeze artist they started off with was kinda mediocre. I've seen better.
Then they had a little girl 8th generation horse trainer, who did some choreography with a beautiful palomino and a little shetland. GKL quite rightly pointed out that if it hadn't been the little girl controlling them, it would have been lame, but I was kinda focused on the beautiful horses. More about them later.
The in-between clowns weren't all that great either. They were ok for a minute or two, but dragged on far too long.
However, the show wasn't a complete bust. I saw my first ever highwire artists. These two brothers. The Marinhos. They ruled. No harnesses or anything. One of them did a little jig along the wire, the other rode a bike. One somersaulted over his brother's head, on a hire wire, with no harness, in mid air. It was great! They did a balancing on shoulders act which they preceeded with a "fall". If they hadn't been playing "The Show Must Go On" I might have believed it. It was very well acted. Talk about wedgie though. Ouch.
Anyway, they impressed me. A lot. I was also incredibly impressed by the horses. 8th generation trainer's dad came on in the second half with 4 palomino horses. Beautiful horses. Here's some pictures from the website...
These horses were magnificent. Four of them, with stupid names - Omega, Cartier, Rolex and Bronze - but absolutely beautiful. They reignited a passion in me, which I'll mention in my next post. They were gorgeous. I don't think I'm quite getting across how wonderful these horses were, lol.
On the way to the circus I'd mentioned to GKL that I'd always wanted to go to one of those old-fashioned circus that used animals. And that maybe I'd have to go to somewhere in Eastern Europe to see lions and tigers and elephants and stuff being mistreated. This circus had animals. Not just the horses, but the ringmaster did an act with budgies. Much funnier than it sounds. He had them going up little slides and jumping onto display cases and things. I was impressed at how well trained they were, but when they "misbehaved" it got even funnier. He got all of the little birdies to slide down this mini slide one by one, and the last one didn't want to get back on his perch afterwards, he kept running back around and doing it again. I thought it was quite funny. GKL was more enamoured with the teeny little boy standing on a ringside seat who was applauding ecstatically every time the little bird ran away. It was very cute.
Overall, despite some boring parts with the well-meaning clowns, I was quite impressed with Zippo's Circus. For 6 quid it was definitely worth the money, and lots more. Even the £2 candyfloss was worth it... scrummy.
It was a good night out, and I enjoyed it. I think GKL did too.
I may go again next time they're back. Those horses can't be guarded 24/7.
PS> For any animal rights activists out there, the horses are treated superbly. There is a page about it on their website. Apparently they've won awards.
Year of the Circuses
Posted by
Cel'eena Cree
comments (0)
Considering that it's April 22nd, and that last week I saw my fourth circus of the year, I've decided to officially make 2009 the Year of the Circuses. And I'm going to make every effort to see as many as I can. The ones I've seen so far?
1) Circus of Horrors
Some time in February I believe, the second time I'd seen it. Both times with GKL, both times at Victoria Hall in Stoke, and both times I absolutely loved it. The first time (last year) I fell in love with Dennis, who performs the first act. Namely, starting the show in a big tank of water and being yanked out of it by chains, to perform an acrobat act over the audience, dripping wet, dressed only in white cotton trousers, on said chains. It was delicious. This time around, GKL decided that since we enjoyed the show so much, we'd take advantage of the 2nd row seats we were offered. The view was spectacular. The water was warm though, which we weren't expecting. Show was as good as the first time. Blood, gore, dwarf urine. Brilliant. Will definitely be seeing it next year.
2) Chinese State Circus
Early March, again with GKL, in the Regent Theatre of Stoke. It was pretty good. Was introduced to some new acts, including some girls doing stuff on bicycles that I suppose traditional circus acts did on horses. It was fun.
3) Cirque du Soleil
I wrote about this as a New Thing. Always wanted to see it. Vaguely disappointed, but glad I did.
4) Mooky's Tower Circus
Very good. Had a disco ball. Mooky did some painting. There were aliens, and a trapeze act of a circling rocket ship. And the only circus I've seen so far that had a water display finale.
1) Circus of Horrors
Some time in February I believe, the second time I'd seen it. Both times with GKL, both times at Victoria Hall in Stoke, and both times I absolutely loved it. The first time (last year) I fell in love with Dennis, who performs the first act. Namely, starting the show in a big tank of water and being yanked out of it by chains, to perform an acrobat act over the audience, dripping wet, dressed only in white cotton trousers, on said chains. It was delicious. This time around, GKL decided that since we enjoyed the show so much, we'd take advantage of the 2nd row seats we were offered. The view was spectacular. The water was warm though, which we weren't expecting. Show was as good as the first time. Blood, gore, dwarf urine. Brilliant. Will definitely be seeing it next year.
2) Chinese State Circus
Early March, again with GKL, in the Regent Theatre of Stoke. It was pretty good. Was introduced to some new acts, including some girls doing stuff on bicycles that I suppose traditional circus acts did on horses. It was fun.
3) Cirque du Soleil
I wrote about this as a New Thing. Always wanted to see it. Vaguely disappointed, but glad I did.
4) Mooky's Tower Circus
Very good. Had a disco ball. Mooky did some painting. There were aliens, and a trapeze act of a circling rocket ship. And the only circus I've seen so far that had a water display finale.
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